405. Twenty five years passed by since I became a monk. For this whole time, I could not obtain stillness of the mind, even for the time of a finger snap.
406. Having not obtained one-pointedness of mind at all, I suffered a lot from lust for sensual pleasures. Finally, weeping with my hands on my head I left the monastery.
407. I shall commit suicide with a knife. What is the meaning of this life? Having become a monk out of faith, how could I die as a layman, rejecting this holy life?
408. Then I took a razor and sat on my bed. I placed the razor on my throat thinking about cutting my vein.
409. Based on this incident, wise consideration arose in me. The danger of sensual pleasures was clear to me. Disenchantment with life was established in my mind.
410. Based on this same incident, my mind was liberated from all defilements. See the excellence of this Dhamma! I too attained the Triple Knowledge. The Buddha’s path has been fully followed by me.
These verses were said by Arahant Sappadāsa.